Spending Christmas at home with the family is not just an opportunity to overeat, deck the halls and make returns to the shopping mall for what I really wanted, it’s an opportunity for my mother to match me up with the only single 30 something she knows. In a community of early bird specials and shuffleboard, I’m impressed by my mother’s skills to hone in on the only man in town who is close to my age. She said it was a shame that I lived eight hours away. I asked if she showed off a picture of me to this gentleman. (I think I may have inadvertedly planted ideas into her head). She said no but I’m sure that will change by next week. And I’m proof positive that if next Christmas rolls around and I’m still single, she’ll invite this chap to join us for dinner.
For Christmas this year, I’ve asked Santa to bring me a new boyfriend. After being single for eight months, I’ll take all the help I can get. The last date I had, all of six months ago, was a weird one to say the least. The date in question idled in my driveway for thirty minutes before I called him to ask his whereabouts. He said that he was outside my door, waiting in his car. Why he didn’t call to let me know of his arrival I’ll never know. Even though the date started out weird well before it began, I let him buy me dinner and fed him the ‘I just want to be friends’ line after he deposited me back to my apartment. I thought I was being nice, letting him down easy, so it was a sure surprise when I discovered that he deleted me from his Facebook friends list a couple months ago. I expect this sort of juvenile behavior from ex-bfs but this was unwarranted. Just like I don’t know what the hell he was doing sitting in my driveway for thirty minutes before our first date, I don’t know what I did to get denied his cyber friendship.
Fast forward to last night when I was partaking in some last minute Christmas shopping at the local shopping mall when I got a call from a number I didn’t recognize. Only when I checked my voicemail did it all come rushing back. The driveway idler left me a message to invite me to his holiday work party downtown later that evening. I didn’t bother returning his call to the last-minute invitation and carried on with my last-minute shopping.
With my car in the shop, I’m tooling around in a rental car for the next week or so. It’s the prime time for cruising town, stalking ex-bfs. I wonder if my first ex has settled down yet. I wonder if my second ex has procreated again, populating the world with more “muppet babies”. I wonder if the last ex has moved out yet. When cyber stalking fails at providing sufficient information, all questions answered with the help of one compact car, a cup of lukewarm coffee and dark sunglasses.
It costs $106 to throw a housewarming party with booze and snacks that no one shows up to. It costs $750 to live in alone in the cool house. It costs $30 a week in gas to go from work to home every day to keep well-oiled the hamster wheel of my stagnant job. A new and better year only weeks away…priceless.
I pad quickly from the bathroom to the bedroom, freshly scrubbed from a steamy shower and stand in front of the heater, shivering into Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer pajamas. I reach to my nightstand to pull a tome from my stack of library books any one that retains my interest past page 50, the mile marker of whether or not I’ll finish. I’ve gotten lazy this year with my passion. Every year I set out to read 100 books, but every year I’m disappointed by falling behind ending the year with 65 or 80. In my defense, I’ve had a busy year. I’ve gotten out of town a lot, having adventures outside of Charlotte. Since January, I’ve been to Chicago, New York City, Asheville, Savannah, Mrytle Beach, Charleston, Atlanta, New Haven. It makes me appreciate home more every time I’m away.
I’ve been through a lot of tissues this year, suffering through the second break up of my adult life. Heartbreak never gets any easier no matter how old you are. Though my spirits down and out, I was on the up and up at work in that I got a raise. I bought myself $125,000 reasons to stay in town. It comes with three bedrooms and a huge kitchen. I am independent woman, hear me roar. So what if I only have $50 in disposable income at the end of every month?
My blog is a year old this month. And on the cusp of every new year, I always wonder if the new year will be THE year, the year for love. 2009 was quite a lonely and depressing one so the year 0f 2010 must bring me more friends and more opportunities to travel and more chances for my heart to take flight.